No bladder left untested
I needed an ultrasound to help figure out what's going wrong. If you're familiar with ultrasounds and uteruses (uteri?) you might know that these are done with a full bladder. According to those in the know, the full bladder makes it easier to distinguish the uterus and recognize what's in it. Hence, the pre-test instructions noted that for a 12:15 appointment, I was to empty my bladder at 11:00, drink 40 oz. of liquids between 11:00 and 11:15, and then refrain from emptying the aforementioned full bladder until after the test was completed.
Enter Teacher Bladder!! Educator humor always mentions teachers' superhuman bladders. I can look at the clock during class, register that I have 40 minutes until the recess bell, and say to myself, "No problem. I can hold it." An ultrasound shouldn't be any different. Or should it?
Well, I was nervous. Nervous about the tests and nervous about the potential results, although I hadn't yet admitted that to myself. Nerves + full bladder = added nervousness and an increased need to go.
Upon arrival at the clinic, I had to wait in not one, but two waiting rooms. Nervousness + waiting + full bladder = even more increased need to go.
After completing the final registration and getting my fashionable wristband, I had to walk past no fewer than two large, prominently labeled restrooms on the way to the radiology department. Oh, the torture!
Yes, I called on my inner teacher - in July. Now that's just cruel.
Labels: family life, Random Thoughts, teachers live at school
Stumble It!
6 Comments:
Hilarious, Daisy!
It's been so long since I've had an ultrasound that I forgot all about the torture of a full bladder. Oh my goodness. But I've found that my bladder strength withers when I'm away from school. Is school the anti-kryptonite for teacher bladders?
Hmm. Anyway, I'm glad I discovered your blog!
Ah, the infamous teacher bladder to the rescue! Hope you get good news from your tests.
The worst part? Once you've stretched your bladder to the outter limits, you end up with a stressed bladder for days.
Oh no!! I HATE the full bladder rule! It's like those appointments ALWAYS take longer!! Good on you - I used to have great control of my bladder...since kids not so much.
During an ultrasound while I was pregnant the ultrasound tech actually let me go use the bathroom during it. Mine must have been too full to see what she needed to see.
Girl. I know EXACTLY what you mean. The teacher bladder comes in so handy. Glad everything came out all right. :o)
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